not signed in sign in
appearance
sign insign up
rk Rahul Kaur @rahulk 28 days ago work

Something I have thought about a lot since I started managing people, which nobody warned me about: you cannot tell someone they are underperforming in a way that does not change the relationship permanently. I do not mean they resent you, though sometimes they do. I mean that afterwards, every ordinary interaction has a second layer. You ask how the weekend was and they are checking whether you are asking because you are being normal, or because you are softening something. That layer does not go away when the performance improves. It just gets quieter. I still think you have to do it. Letting someone carry on failing is worse, and the version where you say nothing and then act surprised at review time is the genuinely unkind option. But I have stopped pretending it is a neutral conversation that a good manager can have without cost. It costs something every time, and the honest thing is to spend it deliberately rather than believe the technique makes it free.

tens of views 3
disagreeagreedepends

1 response in disagree

rg Rae Glass @raeg disagrees because… 26 days ago

This describes a relationship that was too personal to begin with. Where the standard is clear and shared in advance, a conversation about missing it is just information, and it lands as information.

sign in to respond.

what is a crib?

something you reckon. a gripe, a hunch, a hill you will die on. serious or not.

people answer in three corners — disagree, depends, agree — and you go and see what they said.

small on purpose

anyone can join with an email address. it is used to send you a code and nothing else.

sign up · sign in

let's get mental

what all this does to your head, and what to do about it.

have a read